holistic doctor humor

Electronic medical records (EMRs) hold great promise for improving the practice of evidence based medicine by facilitating communication between members of the health care team. The most profound influence of EMRs may lie in their ability to encourage clients' involvement in their own pets care.

holistic doctor humor

Postby malernee » Fri Mar 19, 2004 9:54 pm

anyone got a good article I can give the public when
> > they ask if I am a holistic doctor?
>
Two suggestions:

"Yes, I am entirely a doctor."

"Well, about 97% of me is a doctor, but I think one of my toes is holding
out."

If they specify that they are talking about do you treat their entire pet:


"I only treat the front halves, but I have a partner who specializes in
the back
halves."

People used to ask me if I was a woman doctor. I said no, I treat men and
children too.

Wouldn't a real "holistic" doctor have to do everything from brain surgery
to marriage counselling? In fact, the average "holistic" practitioner is
far more limited than the average family physician.
Having gotten the same question (which struck me as particularly odd, as I
am most definitely a "specialist"), I offer my response:

Patient: Are you a holistic doctor?

Me: Since people have many different ideas of what a "holistic" doctor is,
why don't you explain what you mean when you say "holistic doctor."

Patient: Well, you know, a doctor who treats the whole person, not just
their symptoms.

Me: Once we've discussed your symptoms and I've had a chance to examine you,
then I will propose that we treat only that part of you that is in need of
treatment and leave the rest alone - if that means treating the "whole
person", then I will suggest just that. Why would you want treatment for
parts of you that are doing well?

Patient: I mean will you treat me like a person and not just a collection of
parts?

Me: I treat everybody like a person. Why would I treat a patient any
differently? I may direct my attention to certain parts of you at times, but
I will always treat you like a person because that's what you are. If you
were a brick, I would treat you like a brick.

Patient: No, I mean will you consider my overall wellness when you recommend
treatment?

Me: My goal is to help you to feel better and have better health - it
wouldn't make much sense for me to have, say, your liver feel better while
you feel worse. Even if some treatments make you feel worse in the short
term, their purpose is to help you feel better and be healthier in the long
term.

Patient: I'm not sure what I mean.

Me (to myself): No kidding!


Two suggestions:

"Yes, I am entirely a doctor."

"Well, about 97% of me is a doctor, but I think one of my toes is holding out."

If they specify that they are talking about do you treat their entire pet:

"I only treat the front halves, but I have a partner who specializes in the back
halves."
malernee
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